“Here we go again, I kinda wanna be more than friends…”
–Animal by Neon Trees
I pull into my driveway at 10:20 pm and read a text from my trusted wingwoman and bestie, let’s call her Goodvibegirl.
‘DO NOT EVEN THINK ABOUT FLIRTING OR KISSING OR ANY FORM OF RELATIONS OUTSIDE THE FRIENDZONE. ‘
Goodbuttguy has been back in the country for about a month and apart from a slightly awkward hour of working together we hadn’t spoken. In an attempt to make work less uncomfortable and see if we could stay friends I initiated a catch up.
Mexican food for dinner followed by coffee at a cafe, endless conversation (about his travels and my time home) and lots of laughing. The night went well.
But while looking across the table at the more carefree and still charming man in front of me I couldn’t help but ask myself ‘would I go there again?’ Considering I am about to flee the country myself and I have no idea how he feels about me I know that I should not be considering this possibility, but god his smile gets to me.
Later that night I messaged to thank him for dinner (he paid, reminding me that I paid last time: a year and a half ago), telling him I had a great night. He said he had fun too and I replied hoping he would message back, he didn’t.
Over the next couple of days I think that wanting a text message from him means that secretly maybe, just maybe, I want at least a little more than friendship. And then, standing in the baby section in Myer shopping for a gift for a close friend’s baby shower, his name pops up on my phone. I am happy and relieved; now I don’t have to think of some lame excuse to text him. He asks if I have decided what to buy my friend for her baby shower… is he psychic? I reply and keep the convo going as long as I can (two days to be precise).
After asking how his songwriting is going I request to hear his originals for a birthday present. While we were dating he held his music behind lock and key and refused to play originals to me…. but now? He says yes, ‘anytime’. He tells me I should come around for dinner and to listen to him play sometime. I wonder to myself if the addition of dinner is romantic or just convenient. Maybe he is just lonely with a place to himself? What if he offers wine, would that be a sign to stay the night? Do I reply telling him when I’m free or wait until he asks? I tell him that sounds lovely and leave it at that. That was on Saturday and his name hasn’t popped up since.
I am happy we are talking, I really am. Also I’m not nearly as crazy about him as I used to be so I can more than handle being just friends, which honestly I think is the best decision for us both right now. I may occasionally glance at my phone hoping to see his name but mostly I just enjoy his stories and our now platonic relationship. I have no plans to step out of the friendzone, I promise you Goodvibegirl!
Coffee, Dinner, Your Place. 